Growing up as a hyperactive Jew in a sleepy Protestant town in Pennsylvania, I had a lot of imaginary friends. So interviewing a fictional character comes easily to me.
Following is my recent exchange with Eli Edelmann – the protagonist of my upcoming novel, The Exit Man. (I’m the one asking the questions below; Eli’s the one providing the answers and getting upset.)
Eli, when and where were you born?
What is this, a joke? You CREATED me. Maybe it’s time you quit drinking or at least cut back a bit.
Just humor me, here – it’s for the benefit of my readers.
You assume you HAVE some.
That hurt a little. Just answer the question, or I’ll write a sequel to The Exit Man in which you die slowly and painfully.
Okay, okay – take it easy. Geez, you writer types are so sensitive. I was born in 1979 in Blackport, Oregon.
Where exactly is that in Oregon?
Nowhere – it’s a fictional town. I’m assuming you haven’t lived anywhere long enough to confidently set a novel someplace real.
Keep up the snark – it’s going to be fun to watch you suffer in book two.
Fine. Blackport is allegedly an hour or so southeast of Portland.
What was it like growing up there?
Pretty nice. Blackport is your average city-suburb in the Pacific Northwest – lots of trees and pretty strip malls. I was a typical Oregon kid. Played outside a lot with friends despite the constant drizzling, mistakenly envied all the people living south of us in sunny California, learned to whittle at a young age. Not sure if this is what you’re trying to get at, but there was nothing unsettling or disturbing about my childhood that contributed in any way to who I’ve become.
And who have you become?
At the risk of sounding conceited or delusional, I’d say a hero, a savior of sorts. Though others might say a monster.
Care to elaborate?
Let’s just say that being a rogue euthanasia specialist isn’t the kind of job you’d cite openly on your resume or LinkedIn profile page. But I’m in no way ashamed of what I do. It’s transformed me. I could never have imagined this type of work three years ago. Now I can’t imagine what I’d do without it. More importantly, I can’t imagine what my clients would do without it.
Tell us how you got into such an odd, controversial and risky line of work?
It’s all explained in the first chapter or two of the book, and is even summarized in the blurb about the book on this very website, but I’ll be happy to explain it again here. It’s not like I’m busy or anything. I’m sure the terminally ill client who’s expecting me to be at her house in an hour to help her exit this planet with dignity won’t mind if I’m late.
Kindly ditch the sarcasm and answer the question.
This ‘line of work’, as you put it, sort of just found me. I certainly never planned to go into it. ‘Suicide facilitator' wasn’t among the viable career options my high school guidance counselor ever mentioned. No, I got into the ‘exit game’ after agreeing to help out a desperate old family friend who was dying of not one but two incurable diseases. He had come to me because, in my job at my family’s party supply store, I had easy access to something he needed to help him humanely end his life: Helium. I was initially shocked and angry and appalled when he approached me with his highly unusual and macabre request, but after hearing him out and some serious deliberation and introspection, I decided to lend a hand.
It was meant to be a one-time thing. But the gratitude and calmness I saw in his eyes as he was leaving this world – and the tremendous sense of purpose and empowerment I experienced after carrying out the plan – made me realize I had found my calling. I could make a living through mercy killing. Now, you may be expecting me to follow that up with a sinister laugh, but there’s nothing sinister about what I did… about what I do... about who I am. I’m The Exit Man.
Sounds like a great title for a book.
Damn straight. Can I go now? I have a client who needs me.
Feel free to ask Eli a question of your own in the comment section below – unless you are a cop. For obvious reasons, Eli prefers to steer clear of the authorities.
And if you haven't already done so, be sure to join my mailing list (see the blue box above) to receive a FREE copy of the first chapter of The Exit Man.
Following is my recent exchange with Eli Edelmann – the protagonist of my upcoming novel, The Exit Man. (I’m the one asking the questions below; Eli’s the one providing the answers and getting upset.)
Eli, when and where were you born?
What is this, a joke? You CREATED me. Maybe it’s time you quit drinking or at least cut back a bit.
Just humor me, here – it’s for the benefit of my readers.
You assume you HAVE some.
That hurt a little. Just answer the question, or I’ll write a sequel to The Exit Man in which you die slowly and painfully.
Okay, okay – take it easy. Geez, you writer types are so sensitive. I was born in 1979 in Blackport, Oregon.
Where exactly is that in Oregon?
Nowhere – it’s a fictional town. I’m assuming you haven’t lived anywhere long enough to confidently set a novel someplace real.
Keep up the snark – it’s going to be fun to watch you suffer in book two.
Fine. Blackport is allegedly an hour or so southeast of Portland.
What was it like growing up there?
Pretty nice. Blackport is your average city-suburb in the Pacific Northwest – lots of trees and pretty strip malls. I was a typical Oregon kid. Played outside a lot with friends despite the constant drizzling, mistakenly envied all the people living south of us in sunny California, learned to whittle at a young age. Not sure if this is what you’re trying to get at, but there was nothing unsettling or disturbing about my childhood that contributed in any way to who I’ve become.
And who have you become?
At the risk of sounding conceited or delusional, I’d say a hero, a savior of sorts. Though others might say a monster.
Care to elaborate?
Let’s just say that being a rogue euthanasia specialist isn’t the kind of job you’d cite openly on your resume or LinkedIn profile page. But I’m in no way ashamed of what I do. It’s transformed me. I could never have imagined this type of work three years ago. Now I can’t imagine what I’d do without it. More importantly, I can’t imagine what my clients would do without it.
Tell us how you got into such an odd, controversial and risky line of work?
It’s all explained in the first chapter or two of the book, and is even summarized in the blurb about the book on this very website, but I’ll be happy to explain it again here. It’s not like I’m busy or anything. I’m sure the terminally ill client who’s expecting me to be at her house in an hour to help her exit this planet with dignity won’t mind if I’m late.
Kindly ditch the sarcasm and answer the question.
This ‘line of work’, as you put it, sort of just found me. I certainly never planned to go into it. ‘Suicide facilitator' wasn’t among the viable career options my high school guidance counselor ever mentioned. No, I got into the ‘exit game’ after agreeing to help out a desperate old family friend who was dying of not one but two incurable diseases. He had come to me because, in my job at my family’s party supply store, I had easy access to something he needed to help him humanely end his life: Helium. I was initially shocked and angry and appalled when he approached me with his highly unusual and macabre request, but after hearing him out and some serious deliberation and introspection, I decided to lend a hand.
It was meant to be a one-time thing. But the gratitude and calmness I saw in his eyes as he was leaving this world – and the tremendous sense of purpose and empowerment I experienced after carrying out the plan – made me realize I had found my calling. I could make a living through mercy killing. Now, you may be expecting me to follow that up with a sinister laugh, but there’s nothing sinister about what I did… about what I do... about who I am. I’m The Exit Man.
Sounds like a great title for a book.
Damn straight. Can I go now? I have a client who needs me.
Feel free to ask Eli a question of your own in the comment section below – unless you are a cop. For obvious reasons, Eli prefers to steer clear of the authorities.
And if you haven't already done so, be sure to join my mailing list (see the blue box above) to receive a FREE copy of the first chapter of The Exit Man.
